Aboulomania: When Indecision Becomes Pathological

We have all had to make a difficult decision once in a lifetime. During these moments, we begin to doubt ourselves, and we become nervous about not knowing which alternative to choose. Being indecisive when you have to choose something is normal. However, when it begins to affect your daily life, it can become problematic. If your indecision starts to mess up your personal relationships and it stems from stress, anxiety or depression, you may be suffering from aboulomania.

First and foremost, it is important to emphasize that aboulomania is a mental illness, not just a self-esteem or insecurity problem. It makes it impossible for you to live your life, as it keeps you from making decisions. You no longer feel able to choose, up to the point where choosing what to have for dessert feels like an impossible task. This pathological level of indecision then begins to mess up all your relationships.

What triggers aboulomania?

Research has not been conclusive about what triggers aboulomania. Because of this, the potential patient needs to be studied carefully to find the underlying cause of the condition. Then one can refer to existing studies that have come up with different hypotheses.

A possible cause of aboulomania may lie in the frontal lobe of the brain. This is because it is the area of ​​the brain that is responsible for decision making and may be directly related to the condition.

But researchers also believe that aboulomania may be closely linked to how one was brought up. Thus, overprotective parents can create the toxic environment in which this condition can develop. Children with overprotective parents develop an unhealthy addiction and are dependent on others to make decisions for them. Also, if someone is a victim of humiliation or has been abandoned in childhood, the chances of aboulomania increase as shame, strong insecurities and lack of self-esteem can all trigger the condition.

Despite all this, researchers have not been able to empirically prove the underlying cause of aboulomania. This means that although they speculate and analyze possible causes, they have not found answers that explain every case of aboulomania.

Living with aboulomania

Emotional addiction and aboulomania are not the same thing. This is why getting professional help is so important, since they can help diagnose exactly what is happening. Below are some situations where aboulomania and addiction can overlap and where you can get them to mix.

It is common for people with aboulomania to avoid being alone when they feel a dilemma may arise. But this does not come from a fear of being alone. Instead, it comes from the need to get someone to make the decision for them and take responsibility. Here, the fear of being alone is not the root of the problem, but a symptom of a deeper state.

It is important to mention that this dependence on people makes it easier to manipulate or lie to people with aboulomania. Others may use them and partners may leave them so that they cannot make choices or express disagreement. But leaving someone with aboulomania alone can make them feel powerless and lost.

Diagnosis and treatment

Anxiety and depression often go hand in hand with aboulomania. These are actually the main reasons why patients complain when they finally decide to get help. There are three tests that help narrow the forecast:

• Millon Clinical Multiaxial Inventory (MCMI)
• Minnesota Multiphasic Personality Inventory (MMPI)

• Thematic Apperception Test (TAT)

After diagnosis, professional help is strongly recommended to overcome this disorder. The process consists of dealing with the symptoms first, anxiety, depression or stress, and then with the mental problem. To do so, the specialist will help the patient to develop greater autonomy and develop social skills such as self-confidence. In addition, the specialist will in many cases need to help the patient to develop his self-esteem.

Someone who suffers from aboulomania is not able to make choices. What they should have for lunch, how they should cut their hair, what they should work as… Their indecision reaches the point where not living becomes a better alternative than having to choose how to live.

People with aboulomania can appear as a burden, as others may feel that they have to push them around all the time. In reality, the greater burden is that which individuals with this condition must endure. Because of this, one must find ways to help them achieve the independence and independence they so desperately need. We should try to understand them.