Stop For A Moment: Listen To Your Discomfort

Sometimes stopping for a moment when you feel uncomfortable can be the hardest thing to do. We believe that listening to our emotions, when it is uncomfortable, without finding a solution, is pointless. 

We pretend we do not need to listen, recognize and accept the discomfort. Instead, we hide it because we can not accept the pain.

We sometimes forget that some emotions come and take place. They do not make any sound, but they are full of information. Listening to them will help us recognize them and learn to know ourselves better.
Remember that there are no good or bad feelings. We need every single one of them to be able to appreciate our lives and to be ourselves.

But learning to listen to our emotions means having the ability to unconditionally be able to accept what is coming. We can not judge anything or anyone and we must really learn to live in the present.

None of this is easy by any means. Now we will show you how to accept your discomfort and how to learn to live in the  present.

Listen to and validate your feelings, they are a part of you

Listening, accepting and validating your feelings does not mean that you give in to reality. Giving in means that you allow yourself to be overpowered and that you convince yourself that you can do nothing about what is happening.

On the other hand, accepting and validating what we feel will help us understand what is happening. We will feel a change and then it will just become another part of our emotional universe.

This will make us more aware of how much power our thoughts, our emotions and our inner language have over us. Remember that what we say or think (whether we communicate it to someone or not) can hurt us more than what is actually happening around us. In fact, this harm can be multiplied when you refuse to accept what you feel.

You will surprise yourself when you see how beneficial it can be to listen to your discomfort. In a consultation session, when we ask our patients to follow their feelings, we often see significant changes.

For example, I remember a patient who stopped trying to prevent his  anxiety attacks  from coming. When they stopped, he perceived that the anxiety came from the pain he was going through when he lost a child. Once he knew the source of the pain, the seizures became less frequent and eventually stopped completely.

What we have used for anxiety can also help us with other negative emotions. This can be anything from grief to anger. Living with them is difficult, but that’s the way they talk and you listen.

That’s why I give it a simple idea. Let the painful feelings be with you. Listen to what they have to tell you without trying to get rid of them right away. If you feel overwhelmed by them, seek  professional help.

Awareness: a tool for listening and accepting

One of the easiest ways to start listening to ourselves and accepting our discomfort is in our consciousness. Listening to our emotions is always easier if we can observe our consciousness. Therefore, noticing what we are thinking at any given moment will help us to see details about our feelings that we would not otherwise do.

That is the power of observation. We only notice the nuances of our experience when we observe accurately. When we sit down and listen.

That is why observing what we think, feel and notice in our body is so important. To get the most out of this observation, we must be able to do this without being pulled away by the experiences that may arise. To do this, you can follow these strategies:

• Breathing as a starting and meeting point. Breathing is one of the easiest ways to put ourselves in the moment. Focusing on the necessity of breathing  is crucial when one begins to practice mindfulness. It’s cold you can lose focus sometimes and stumble in your mind. But returning to breathing will take you back to the present.

• Everything gets worse before it gets better. When we learn to listen to what we feel, to accept what is happening, our discomfort may grow. But keep in mind that this decline is not going to last long. And if we do it right, it will not be long before we start to get better.
• You can scan your body to really feel it. Our body contains a lot of information. Being aware of our senses and our tension will help us to know ourselves better and to let go of our emotions.
• Be kind to yourself and the experience. We are often our worst enemy. We judge all our negative experiences and multiply the emotions by giving a judgment. What happens is neither good nor bad. It just happens and for the most part we can not change it. Accepting yourself and letting go is just another part of the experience since judging will not solve anything.

Now you have the tools you need to stop ignoring your unpleasant thoughts, feelings and emotions. Now you can live without feeling uncomfortable because you are trying to avoid it.

Just listen to what the discomfort and pain are trying to tell you. You can learn a lot by doing it, because this is what holds the key that you need to overcome it.