The Advantages And Disadvantages Of Self-disclosure

No one asks us about personal things. However, we use self-disclosure when we want to create a bond with the other person. Self-disclosure must be considered a strategy because it is part of our social skills. Some people use these skills more often than others. While the use may be beneficial, it can also lead to certain problems with excessive use.

Self-disclosure when we meet new people

How can you identify self-disclosure? Well, it’s very simple. Every time you express your opinions, express your wishes, or talk about yourself, you use self-disclosure. As mentioned earlier, this is a great strategy to get others to know you. It creates a warm and pleasant atmosphere. Overall, it helps you connect with the person you want to get to know. For example, if you express your thoughts and someone agrees, you are on the right track to building a strong connection.

Giving information about ourselves to others is very nice. It builds trust and invites the other person to talk about themselves as well. In such circumstances, it is normal that there are interest and personal questions.

Self-disclosure is a very useful tool to use if you want people to really get to know you. You are the one who knows you better than anyone else. If you think you do not have many social skills, this is a good strategy to use to start a conversation with someone. Providing information is always an attractive thing. It makes the other person curious and you make them want more.

But even if you use this strategy, you can still make some mistakes. There are times when we do not know why the other person did not like us or that the chemistry did not agree. These situations can reveal some issues related to self-awareness. Let’s dive a little deeper into this.

The problems of self-disclosure

Although self-enlightenment seems to be an excellent way to start conversations and meet new people, the truth is that we sometimes do better without it. In the following sections, we will point out some of the mistakes we make with this strategy that can lead to unpleasant situations.

To give a false picture

All information we share about ourselves is “good information”. We do not talk about the things we do not have, nor do we mention our faults and weaknesses. If we only provide good information about ourselves, we can project a false image of perfection that can cause us to lose credibility.

Think of a situation where some people thought they were flawless and better than everyone else. That person probably exaggerated everything they said. Maybe they focused too much on their positives instead of balancing them out with their mistakes.

Sharing too much

Some people love that others are completely transparent to them, and tell them their life stories, even when they have just met each other. But some feel uncomfortable with a certain type of information. For that reason, it is important to be careful. Get to know the person you are talking to before sharing too much information with them.

Being too explicit can make a person you do not know very well feel uncomfortable. The reason for this is that you do not know what their taboos are, what they believe in, or how they feel about what you are talking about.

For example, telling a really detailed story or expressing your deep feelings can lead to rejection if there is not enough trust in the other person. Being aware of the person’s body language and expressions is crucial, as it will help you figure out if you need to keep something to yourself, or if you can keep telling.

One thing that is important to note is that being too closed and reserved makes it more difficult to create new relationships. Still, the same goes for sharing too much and talking to someone we haven’t known for years. It is important to be free from the extreme. The success of self-disclosure is in balance.

The experiences of publishing oneself

It is very likely that most of us have made mistakes with regard to self-enlightenment. This is perfectly normal. It is not easy to distinguish between what kind of information we should give first, or guess if the other person will feel uncomfortable with what we tell them. Little by little, your experiences will teach you when, how and with what types of people to publish yourself for.

The most important thing is to be aware of the moments when we use this social skill automatically. It is important that we start using it consciously, so that we can have good experiences and establish special bonds with different people.